Friday, 2 October 2009


The Lancrigg, Lentil Soup, Tofu Cheesecake, Slim T and Poetry Competitions

The sun has been shining and at last we have had some summer. Too late. Hacked right off. I suffer from SAD syndrome and it kicked in around the beginning of June this year, instead of the usual late January. Without a holiday in two years and working far too hard trying to hold it all down, it was time for a break. And what a break it was. Short, but very very sweet.

The Lancrigg ( will feature in depth in Issue 5 out November 1st but for now let me whet your appetite about this most wonderful hotel deep in the forests of Grasmere in the heart of the Lake District. The place is just sublime and features about 10 or 12 rooms in a beautiful country house with first rate facilities, most excellent service, an incredible hospitable host in the form of Robert the owner, and the most inexplicably awesomely stunningly outrageous lentil soup in existence this side of the next universe. And the nut roast was just so good too. Joined at the hip by a fine hefty Bordeaux, plus the immaculate company of my treasured and much loved Dad Chris, now in his 80’s and still in the prime of life, this was the best it gets really.

The Friday started with the most immaculate Lentil Soup I have ever tasted. Did I mention that? The Nut Roast was rich, moist and flavoursome, the Cheesecake almost Bavarian in texture and the best use of tofu imaginable, and the wine was so quality that even the two of us could only manage a half bottle. A single malt before (whose name escapes, but images of heaven were conjured up by its smell let alone taste and effect) and a cognac after (equally sublime) plus a little coffee and those deep luxurious after dinner sofas in the lounge were way and above what any of us truly deserve, to be quite frank. Except nurses and saints of course. And Louis Saha right now.

All too soon it was over, the rest can be read in November, but oh my gosh what a most beautiful break. Thanks to everyone especially Robert and his team and also me Dad for putting up with me all the way up there and back. Appreciated.

The only problem is that I have changed my name again, this time to Slim T, on account of all the training and Chi Kung and lack of beer recently. The Lancrigg visit has slightly threatened the description and also weakened my resolve for alcohol and rich food. But Slim T it is for now, and we are all hard at work on Issue 5 as well as the Eco Veggie Fayres ( with Croydon in a month, and Reading before Christmas, Brighton next spring and now the Bristol 2 day mega bash for May 29th and 30th 2010. Croydon is already officially over half full and filling out fast with loads of peeps on board already and our recently announced poetry competition has already received some quite dreadful entries as well as one or two good ones – more are welcome, closing date is near the end of October sometime, email with your best efforts.

Until next time

Peace xxxSlimT


Autumn already. Where was the summer? What happened? Why?

Trying to make a living out of selling sunblock has suddenly become less attractive. In 2006 we sold so much that even the tax man got interested. Now, it’s a pittance. Even being voted best option Sunblock in Ethical Consumer last July hasn’t made a dent. I really feel for all those people trying to make a go out of the UK holiday season.

And so, September. The month of new beginnings, new friendships, new goals, new targets and new shoes too if you are lucky. The heating has gone back on, the second duvet is at the bottom of the bed ready in preparation for that first autumnal chill that actually we have already experienced this recent August Bank Holiday which despite the sunny predictions was absolutely freezing – in Bristol at least.

My training programme continues with a vengeance and the deal is no beer for the whole month whilst stepping up the workouts. Its not actually getting any easier and its not as much fun as when I was 13 but it still has its feelgood factor and of course there is once again the ‘why have a six pack when you can have a barrel’ question. For years I have been working on the Barrel theory but undoubtedly since starting training last June the six pack has come to the fore and is distinctly more rewarding, and quite frankly not as ugly either. Definitely better for the beach look, anyway.

Despite the gruesome weather and the 4 hour queue to get into the Banksy exhibition there have been highlights this summer – and none more so than when the beautiful Glass ‘o Water returned from 6 weeks in Kathmandu avec French Boyf. They had been out there on holiday and night stopped a couple of days before onwards to France for more studies. Interestingly the Boyf, being from France, had never really come across food without meat in it before, and I was more than pleasantly surprised to see he chomped down both a Redwoods ¼ pounder with Meltin Cheezly and a Fry’s burger too without any episodes and then proceeded to lick the plate clean from my Lentils a la Mediterranean with Mushrooms marinaded in Garlic and Red Wine with Wild Rice speciality which was encouraging. The daughter meanwhile was sick everywhere but more than probably that was a touch of the ol Delhi Belhi than her dad’s vegan a la carte menu de la maison.

Issue 5 of Off the Hoof is now under way and I have just returned from a clandestine meeting with Agent H where we were discussing her next articles. Seems like an expose into the Freedom Foods label farce gets the vote, whilst an undercover operation against a local firm is yet to be disclosed and there might be an embargo on it so we are not sure about that one. Meanwhile Large Tone has been helping me with the organising of our first Eco veggie Show in Croydon on November 1st – see . I am however worried that he wants to spend an alarming proportion of the show budget on cake. I know it is the 65th anniversary of World Vegan Day but I’m not sure we can stretch to a 4 figure cake allowance in a recession. He also has this annoying counter on one of his websites which is counting down to November 1st – last look and its only 60 days to go – as if I need reminding, thanks!

Do feel free to forward Issue 4 of Off the Hoof to all and sundry, especially sundry, until next time


Monday, 17 August 2009


Beer, Football, Training and Hopi Indians

It’s that time of year again, the start of the football season, and back to school in a couple of weeks

I don’t know about you but even at the ripe old age of 46 I still feel like an 8 year old and with September looming, it’s coming to the end of the summer hols, a fact underlined by the start of the football season the weekend just gone. Supporting a team that gets beat 6-1 at home on the opening day is a classic case of ‘I didn’t choose to be a football supporter, football chose me.’ In many ways I truly wish I just didn’t care about football, but that would be like trying not to care about beer, sex and life in general. Recently I have even been contemplating death – not in a suicidal way (well, not often) but more in a ‘am I ready for this’ scenario. Well boy you’ve got the rest of your life to get ready for that one so best get on with it.

With this in mind I have made two big adjustments to my life – Drink less beer, and start training. The former is easy as crisp cold San Pellegrino fizzy water with half a lime does wonders for replacing a crisp cold San Miguel without any lime no problem. But the training is a little bit different. The running is ok but it’s the upper body that is screaming in protest at the amount of press ups and chin ups it is being required to perform. It is ten long years since these muscles saw a proper sustained period of working out and they say muscles have memories but these lot must have forgotten because they really are not happy at this latest Sunday development

So the result is every Monday I wake up feeling completely wretched and done in, in no way able to work and barely able to breath. This feeling continues long into the week, to around about Saturday lunch, when a few swift pints soon sort that out – completely exhausted, sighing and whingeing all the time, and looking in the mirror every 5 minutes to see if there is even a modicum of growth to those pecs in exchange for all the hardship they are experiencing. I don’t know why I bother – as soon as I stop, within a few weeks I will have developed man boobs where once there used to be hard muscle. Gutted.

For those of you who are in the slightest bit interested, I live on a diet of dehulled hemp seed and hemp oil right now, with an assortment of fruit vegetables and grains to accompany. Hemp to Slick Timbo is like spinach to Popeye – I swear by it and with about 100gms of dehulled seed a day, and a 500ml bottle of help oil a week there is no way I am going short of nutrients.

Anyway – it is Monday morning so best off get some work done – we are releasing issue 4 of Off the Hoof online for free this week after me and Posh Eddy became converts to the Hopi Indian prophecies after catching them on YouTube – and decided that issue 4 is so good that it needs delivering to the 4 corners of the world via the internet without charge.

And we are announcing our new Off The Hoof On Tour Eco Veggie Fayres this week too so there’s a load to be done and as usual I cant really be bovvered with any of it but there you go, with any luck I’ll get fit and be able to keep up with the demands of running 4 businesses without an overdraft in a recession.

Until next time

Xxxpeace Slick Timbo

Ps Big thanks going out to all our team and all our supporters – you are truly magnificent. In Moyes we trust.